An inexplicable rage held me by the throat. Fear percolated through my body like myoglobin. You keep me here. Ensnared. Nowhere to run and no one to turn to. I’m trapped here in this prison you made me.
But I am the abuser. I make you feel so rotten inside the maggots on our trash look clean. I am what gives you the thoughts you project on everyone else.
You don’t see the hollowness you tore into me. The scared little girl you created. The agony you force me to endure. No one does.
You necessitate my silence. What happens in our house stays in our house.
When I finally get a handful of justice you dismantle it and throw me back into the cage. You turn every freedom away from me. You slander my name for your benefit.
I am the monster. I am the one who should be feared.
You beat me down with your iron fist and your disgusting vexation.
You devoured my ebullience. The innocent light that made me who I was.
You mutilated my personality until there was nothing left but the emptiness I carry with me now.
You turned those close against me. You keep my father’s love from me.
I was just a little girl, who didn’t understand the world.
I had been abandoned.
I gave you everything I had and more when I wasn’t supposed to.
You were supposed to be a parent! You graciously took the place of my mother when she wasn’t there, but I never asked you to! How many times had I suffered to make sure YOU were okay!? The only time you look at me is when you’re angry. I don’t exist but to be your punching bag as you hurl your degrading words and slanders at me!
I was broken when you found me, and instead of being an adult and putting the pieces back together, you had to demolish them even more.
I scream until my throat bleeds trying to expel this agony you placed in me. I worry till my head falls off from the fear you instilled in me. I can’t trust anyone because of the lies you have always told me.
I wake up every day in the misery you created for me.
I promise I will be heard, and one day, you will wake up with the misery I create for you.